Where should I begin? I could tell you about Mary's double ear infection-probably brewing for a couple weeks but undisgnosed until last Friday. Or I could describe a week and a half's worth of the diarrhea she has had. Or that she has been fussing frequently lately, kicking out her legs and rocking her body and sxcreaming every time I put her down.
But instead, let's just focus on this morning. Brian is in California, so it's just me against them. Did I say against? I meant and. Yeah. Mary woke up at 6, crying. So I nursed her in bed forever as this still calms her. Somehow, 2 hours later, I have not managed to leave the house. So I kick it in to high gear and hustle the girls out the door. When we got to "school" Annie has realized that we did not bring one of her stuffed cats. I had realized this on the way to school but at that point it was too late to turn back. So she's in tears. Luckily, awesome Miss Joanne scooped her up and calmed her with the promise of getting her choice of school stuffies. Annie did manage a weak, "Bye. Love you." through her drying tears.
So, off to the infant room! Here it was business as usual as Mary started clutching me harder once we entered the room. As I tried to set her down to take of her jacket, she would not detach. Not even a teacher's offer of crackers would calm her. But I had to go! I was running late for work and and hanging out would only delay the inevitable. So I handed her to crackerteacher and left to the sound of her crying. I was 2 for 2.
Lots of things are bothering me but mostly it's the feeling that I had forgotten about working and being a mom: You can't really ace both. Oh, some days you can, sure. But mostly, you will come up short on one or the other or both whether it's forgetting a stuffie or not knowing what's wrong with your little chum, you will fell terrible and failtastic.
What is wrong with Mary? I'll call the doctor again but even with my bosses out of town, I can't leave early for an appointment. I left early last week for her appointment and with such a small office, I have to be here today. Tomorrow, maybe I can take her. But what do I tell the doctor? She isn't herself? She seems to be in some sort of pain with the kicking and screaming. It can't be the ear infections anymore because she's been on the antobiotics for 5 days now. Although it looks like two big, honkin' teeth are coming in, she's not worrying her mouth at all. It msut be related to the poopsters. Sigh. I swear she's been sick since I started working again.
1 comment:
Oh. Oh dear. You nailed it all perfectly. You ARE super mom because she screws up all the time too. It sounds so cheesy, but your kids know you love them. Even if you're feeling like you're a failure they think you're amazing. And you ARE amazing! I can't imagine doing what you do. You're my hero, and as soon as Annie and Mary are old enough to say so they'll tell you that.
Chin up, you're an inspiration.
Tell the doctor just what you said in this post. She's not herself. Might be nothing. Might be something. Worth checking. Can you get an evening appointment? Some say that teething causes poops. Sounds bizarre, but I saw it with Nicko. There's also the mysterious "growing pains", which Kirk Cameron can attest to.
xoxo.
O
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